Correct me if I'm wrong, Sam Edwards, but I think in terms of free 3G phones, I "pwn" you. Obsoive. The first thing I did with this phone is assign "Daniel McClelland - Little Girl.mp3" as the ringtone. Perfect. If you want to video-call me or send me some hawt pics, you'll have to use my work number: (+6421) 723 707.

In other news, Celia and I are looking for a 2 bidrim house in Mt. Cook, Oriental Bay, Aro Valley... basically anywhere close enough to the city to walk to but far enough to be Gus-the-cat friendly.

Edit: For Aggie (all my good underwear is in the wash):

I really hate this place.

I'm just killing time until I get home this weekend coming, so there are no stories to tell.

See you at the suprise welcome home party.

Between the boys and the babes, I'm really happy.

I. Like. To party. I like, I like to party!

Friday night: land in Werringhon.

Saturday: brilliant housewarming feat. strawberries & Fraise and the best lamb of my life. Hot tip — lamb is the new steak. Try marinating and then barbecuing seasoned chops in a crust of equal parts mint, lemon, garlic and olive oil. The night was rounded out by a sweet 21st in Petone where I tried to buy girls drinks but had my card declined. Eek! Quote of the night: "I'm not a skinhead, I'm just racist"... aah, Petone.

Sunday: blurry on details. Feel free to invent your own adventure with the following keywords: suave, hilarious, unflappable, kooky, an instant bestseller.

Monday: happy birthday Bob, One Love! The thing about One Love is that it is actually about the love. So when someone asks, "Who's yer mate?" you are justified in replying, "Why, everybody!" (Alternatively, "Would you like some more cider?" works well too.) After an armada of 'Yay!'s and a bevvie of boogies the day was once again cemented as Best Of The Year, for the fifth time running. When you're as cool as I am, it is easy to forget that you are also a complete dickhead, so it was as surprising for me as for her when I let slip with one of the most ferociously insensitive things I've said in months. It took a much tinier female to be the bigger man, and a stellar conversational marathon to make things much better than before, by the time we fell asleep at dawn.

Tuesday and I'm blue to be returning to Auckland. In fact, you might say that I was so blue to be returning that I handed in my notice at the first opportunity. You might even say that I will most likely be "coming back home/to the place I belong" (to be confirmed at a meeting at the end of this week). If I'm to be frank: I hate this stinking shit hole. Also, I miss my beautiful friends and I'd hate to miss out on making more.

P.S. You might have gathered from the last paragraph that the Black Seeds have found a way back into my heart. And you'd be right. They were perfect on Monday. Thank you Barnaby, for a wonderful evening. Kiss kiss.

P.P.S Funniest. Thing. In world.